INTRODUCTION

Nearly everyone, if asked to be truly honest, would admit that they have regrets. Certain things we have done or said or thought or whatever, we have regrets. As the saying goes, hindsight is 20:20. We have things that we wish hadn’t happened. I can think of situations in my own life where I have done something or said something that I later regretted and decided wasn’t a great thing to do. But regret can be a powerful feeling, and if we don’t take care of it rightly it can be a huge issue in our lives.

When I was in college I went on a prison ministry trip and we went to the Statesville Correctional Facility just outside of Chicago. Statesville is a maximum-security prison for men, and is known for its roundhouse, a completely round room with an open center where you can stand in the center and look around and see up to all four floors of cells the whole way around. But I remember going in and talking with the inmates, and we had literature to give them and scripture to share with them. There was a difference we notice in some. Almost all of them had experienced regret over things they had done in their lives. They looked back and wished they hadn’t made certain choices or done certain things. I remember talking with one man who was in prison for life for murder, and he was miserable. He told me God could never forgive what he had done, and he didn’t want to talk about it. He had experienced regret, but he didn’t deal with it. He never repented, and this left him miserable.

There were other men whom I met with. Two guys in particular stick out. We were in the roundhouse, and there weren’t traditional bars like you’d think on a prison cell, there was just a door, and where there would be a window there was a metal screen with little holes so you could barely see the people you were talking to. And as I talked with these two men who were awaiting sentencing, they shared with me how they came to Christ in prison. One showed me his Bible and how he read it and mined its pages to find the truth. These two guys had experience regret, they looked back at their lives and they would have changed things if they could, but instead of letting the weight of that bear down on them, they had done something about it—they repented. Contrary to the first guy I talked about, they repented of their sin and it changed the direction of their life.

There’s a difference between regret and repentance.  In our spiritual lives, we can either be like the first guy I met, who felt the weight of regret for what he’d done but didn’t do anything about it, or we can be like the second guys I encountered, who turned their regret into repentance and got rid of it forever. It seems like a simple choice, but it’s one that we are often times not very willing to make.

In our own spiritual lives, it can be easy to experience regret without repentance. We sin, or do something we know we shouldn’t, and we feel bad about it, but we don’t really take care of the issue. Maybe we push it back into the back corner of our lives, or we hide it under the rug, or pretend it isn’t there, but we don’t really take care of things. We don’t really deal with our stuff in a Biblical way. As a result, we have many unresolved issues. We have sins in our hearts, relationships that are broken, friendships that are lost, pain and heartache that won’t leave all because we don’t deal with things rightly. In fact, many churches today are full of people who haven’t dealt with their problems biblically. Though individuals may experience regret over a broken relationship or people problems caused by sin, they often times fail to move towards true repentance, and as result they are left to bear the burden of their shame and regret. Oftentimes this failure to express biblical repentance leads to bitterness and anxiety, further disrupting the spiritual lives of individuals within the church and those around them.  This is not a great place to be!

And as we come to Lamentations today, we see that this is very similar to where God’s people were. And as we start chapter 5 today, we see Jeremiah attempting to lead the people towards true Biblical repentance. They perhaps had experienced regret; they certainly felt the affects of sin in their lives as they suffered God’s hand of judgement. And now Jeremiah attempts to lead them in dealing with their regret rightly and moving toward Biblical repentance. As we walk through this passage together, there’s one truth I want you to remember—it’s our big idea for this morning.

Big Idea: Repentance is greater than regret.

2 Characteristics of biblical repentance:

1) Honesty (vs. 1-18)

Explanation: As we come to the beginning of the chapter, we find Jeremiah opening up in honesty. There is an honest prayer of repentance and desiring for things to be restored to God. If we are to deal with our regret—to turn it into repentance, we need to begin with an open honesty before God.  Boys and girls, you can draw an honest person.

You see, many times we fail to truly repent of our sins because we aren’t really honest with God about them. We want to shove them under the rug or hide them in the corner. We want to pretend that we had a righteous reason for doing what we did or that we can somehow justify it. We don’t really like being open and exposed before God, so we won’t put ourselves in that place. We won’t really own up to the severity of our sin and the reality of where it brought us, and so though we may experience regret, even guilt or shame, we never really take care of our sin. And this is where Israel was for much of Lamentations. And Jeremiah becomes really honest in this chapter about where they were and where they had been. Notice how this looked for Jeremiah:

A. Accept the reality of your situation (vs. 1-14)

Explanation: if we’re going to be honest, we need to accept the reality of our situation. We see Jeremiah doing this in verse 1.

Lamentations 5:1 NASB95

Remember, O Lord, what has befallen us; Look, and see our reproach!

His honesty leads him to the reality of his situation—there is no hope without God. There is no mercy without God. There is no hope for repentance and restoration unless Jeremiah and the people turned to God. So Jeremiah gives this prayer invoking God to remember; to look, and see their reproach. It’s not as if God had truly forgotten, or God couldn’t look and see their reproach. God did remember them, and he could see what was going on, but Jeremiah invokes God specifically to pay attention to what His people had been experiencing. He realized that their only hope was through God, and so he implored God to take action and do something on their behalf.

This is what a lament does. Lamentations is a book of laments, and here we see that if we are to express true Biblical lament—whether it be lament over sin or lament over difficulties in our lives, it is appropriate, even necessary, to invoke God to action. Many times, in our lives, especially when we give in to sin, we don’t even recognize God. We aren’t honest about our situation and we don’t really accept the reality of it. Instead of dealing with our regret and sorrow over what we may have done, we simply refuse to acknowledge it. We don’t bring it to God. Or maybe we blame someone else—“well if only they would . . .” Or we try to handle it on our own. And we’re not really honest about our own situation.

Application: Here we see Jeremiah leaving an example to us. He deals with his stuff. He accepts the reality of his situation—he couldn’t get out of it without God. He couldn’t get out of it without the people turning to God in repentance! So many times, this is the way it is with us as well. Many times in our lives, regret is great.  We see the effects of what we’ve done and the harm we have caused.  But Lamentations 5 reminds us:

Big Idea: Repentance is greater than regret.

We turn regret into repentance when we accept the reality of our situation—we need God’s help.  And we turn to God, accepting our need of him.

We continue in the passage and Jeremiah rehearses again the results of sin in the lives of the people. We see the pain and headache their situation brought in verses 2-14. But as we reach verse 15 we see that it had physical affects on the people.

B. Admit the frailty of your humanity (vs. 15-18)

Lamentations 5:15–18 NASB95

The joy of our hearts has ceased; Our dancing has been turned into mourning. The crown has fallen from our head; Woe to us, for we have sinned! Because of this our heart is faint, Because of these things our eyes are dim; Because of Mount Zion which lies desolate, Foxes prowl in it.

Explanation: we find that if we are to be honest in our repentance, we not only do we need to accept the reality of our situation; we also need to admit the frailty of our humanity. As Jeremiah was honest about his situation, he came to realize the frailty of his own humanity. He understood how frail and helpless he really was. He came to honestly admit where the sin of the people had taken them. Look at what he says—the joy of our heart had ceased, our dancing has turned to mourning. We see Jeremiah being honest about his own situation, and that of the entire nation. Their joy had gone! Their dancing was now mourning. This is what living in sin does to us—it sucks our joy. Jeremiah admitted his own human frailty here—they were miserable! This is why they needed to deal with their regret. Because if they don’t have godly sorrow, it won’t lead to repentance, it will only lead to the misery of guilt and being controlled by the thought of your own sin. It will lead to hiding and pretending and overlooking. He admitted—they were miserable because of their sin and they needed God’s help! Notice verse 16-17—Woe to us for we have sinned, because of this our heart is faint. After he acknowledges the reality of his condition—woe for we have sinned, he admits his own human frailty—our heart is faint. Sin not only takes our joy sin makes us weary. It makes us faint; tired; and weak. The reality is that in our own human frailty we cannot handle sin on our own. We cannot handle our regret, and this is why we need to bring it to God. This is why we need to come to God in repentance as Jeremiah did, and as he implored God’s people to.

Application: so many times in our lives we experience the frailty of our own humanity when we sin. It makes us weary; it steals our joy and makes us miserable. It makes us feel weak and beaten down after riding the same merry-go-round of our sin over and over and over again. How do we get off this seemingly endless cycle? How do we escape the weariness and faintheartedness brought about by our sin? We do this through repentance. We do this by bringing our regrets to God and leaving them at his feet.

Illustration: I think David in the Bible is a perfect illustration of this. We talked about David briefly last week. His sin made a mess of things. He had committed adultery, murder, and deceit. And Psalm 51 is his well-known Psalm of confession, and he gets honest about what sin had done in his life. He talks about feeling like his bones were broken. He asks God to make him hear joy and gladness, because all of that had left him. He says “restore to me the joy of your salvation.” David came to understand the reality of his sin. He didn’t stop at regret, he moved to repentance. He honestly accepted the reality of his situation—he had sinned and needed God. He admitted the frailty of his humanity—he was weak and joy had left. And so he came to God in repentance.

Application: this is what we need to do as well. Sometimes we would rather suffer in our sin and the condition it brings than move towards God in repentance. We may even experience regret over what we’ve done, but not enough to move us to repentance. We need to follow the example here in our passage—be honest. Accept the condition sin has brought us to, admit our own human weakness as a result, and come to God.  We need to remember:

Big Idea: Repentance is greater than regret.

2) Humility (vs. 19-22)

Explanation: coming back to our passage, there’s a second characteristic of true repentance—humility. If we are to take regret and turn it into repentance, we can’t just just stop with honesty, we need humility. Boys and girls, you can draw a humble person. As we come to our text we see Jeremiah, coming to God in humility. We see him modeling for the people, and for us, how to come to God. He comes in humility.

You see, if we are to truly repent, this requires humility. Many times we aren’t willing to humble ourselves in humility to God. This really is the difference between regret and repentance. You can regret that you did something, or regret that something happened, but true humility takes responsibility for the results. True humility recognizes that we are accountable to someone greater than ourselves, and we need Him for our restoration. Let’s look at how Jeremiah recognized this here.

a. Embrace divine sovereignty (vs. 19-20)

Explanation: notice, if we are to turn to God in humility, we need to embrace divine sovereignty. Jeremiah commits himself to the sovereign hand of God here. Verse 19 states: You, O Lord, rule forever; Your throne is from generation to generation. Jeremiah commits himself to the divine sovereignty of God. It’s as if he needs the reminder. He reminds himself, and he embraces for himself the sovereignty of God.

Application: Many times when life gets tough, we forget the fact that God is in control. We forget, or we willingly deny what we know is already true. Or when we live in our own sin like Israel was doing, we go through life without even acknowledging God. We do our own thing, make ourselves the king of our own lives, and live life for our own pleasure. Jeremiah reminds us here that in order to repent, we need to practice humility, and it’s the humility of acknowledging God’s sovereignty. God was in control. After everything Jeremiah and God’s people had gone through, God was in control. He had never left. Nothing was out of his hands, and Jeremiah takes time to embrace this here. After all the feelings of faintheartedness, all the loss of joy, he remembers that God is in control.

Explanation: notice that it is on the basis of God’s sovereignty that he can then question God in an appropriate manner—Why do You forget us forever? Why do You forsake us so long? Because God is sovereign, he then moves to the question—God, how long are you going to do us? It’s not that God really forget them or forsook them forever, but he’s expressing his own emotions to God—“God, this seems to have been going on forever! God, why are you forsaking us for so long?” He’s summoning God to action here based on God’s sovereignty. Jeremiah embraces divine sovereignty.

b. Pursue divine restoration (vs. 20-21)

Explanation: he also pursues divine restoration. As he comes to God in humility, he recognizes that only God can bring about restoration. Only God can grant forgiveness to repentant hearts and bring about true restoration. The only hope for sinful people is the sovereign work of God. We can’t defeat sin on our own; we can’t restore ourselves to a right relationship with God. Jeremiah knew this here. He says “restore us, that we may be restored. Renew our days as of old.” Jeremiah comes to God in complete humility—“God, I know you are in control; I know our nation messed up big time! God, restore us. Put the pieces back together. God, take care of all of our stuff that’s in our hearts so that we can be restored and right with you.” Jeremiah pursued divine restoration. He knew that we can’t persevere in the faith on our own. We need to humble ourselves and seek divine restoration.

Illustration: I think we see an illustration of this in the life of the apostle Peter. Remember Luke 22:31-32? The disciples were arguing about who would be greatest in the kingdom of God. And Jesus comes on the scene and rebukes them—whoever wants to be great needs to be the servant, he said. Then, right before he tells Peter that he will deny Jesus 3 times, he says “Simon, Simon, behold, Satan has demanded permission to sift you like wheat; 32 but I have prayed for you, that your faith may not fail; and you, when once you have turned again, strengthen your brothers.” Did you catch what’s going on here? I have prayed for you that your faith may not fail . . . once you have turned again. Isn’t this basically what Jeremiah said—restore us so we may be restored? We find here the very same thing happening in both passages—God’s sovereign grace bringing people back. Jesus recognizes this in Luke, and Jeremiah recognizes this in Lamentations.

Application: It is God who brings us back, that’s why we need to humble ourselves before him. Because God is our only hope for perseverance in faith. God is our only hope for restoration.

Explanation: and this reminds us the chief difference between regret and repentance.  I have here a diagram that shows our sin. 

*Taken or adapted from The Biblical Counseling Alliance

You can think of it like a geyser.  Often times there are hidden heart issues underneath our sin.  What we love and worship, and what we want and desire.  These are often unseen and under the surface.  But when we don’t get what we love and worship, or what we want and desire, we often explode like a geyser.  And things come out that perhaps we didn’t know were even there—anger, worry, anxiety, depression, fear, pride—all these things.  And if we are to deal with them, we need to get at the heart level—the unseen.  Regret, deals with this outer level—it says “I’m sorry this happened, I made a mess of things, I’m such a horrible person.”  But it doesn’t really deal with the root issue.  Repentance deals with another level—the unseen level.  Repentance says “I was wrong; I sinned; I’m going to take care of it.”  When we follow God’s way of repentance instead of restoration, we take care of our sin rightly and we have hope. 

This is where the Gospel comes in. Romans 8:34 speaks of Christ sitting at the right hand of the Father interceding for us. Speaking on our behalf. Satan brings his accusations against us and he wants us to feel regret.  But when we choose repentance Jesus says “no, he is mine; she is mine. I died for them; they’re mine; don’t condemn them, they’re forgiven.” We learn that we can come back to God—we can turn our regret into repentance, we can come to God in honesty and humility because of Christ, and because of the power of his Spirit working inside of us.  And you know what we find when we come to God?  We find God ready and willing to forgive! We don’t need to hide our regret deep down inside, we can take care of it! We can use it when we repent, and God will take it away!

Explanation: we come back to our last verse, verse 22: Unless You have utterly rejected us and are exceedingly angry with us. The book ends in dissonance—the situation isn’t resolved. It ends much like our own trials and sufferings—there’s no resolution. And he is left to rely on the sovereign plan and control of God, but what a great place to be! He offers this not in despair of the salvation of is people, but as a way to express his own grief over where they were at. Because he knows God has a plan; he knows God hasn’t rejected them forever, even though it seems like it, and he knows that ultimately God will accomplish his good and perfect plan and God will remain faithful to his promises.

CONCLUSION

We opened today by talking about the two types of individuals I encountered on my prison trip. One experienced regret, but he just let the weight of his past weigh down on him and it led him to despair. Another deal with his past properly—he turned to God in repentance, and was able to leave the burden of regret behind.

You may have regret in your life this morning. Perhaps you relate to these situations we’ve been talking about in the lives of God’s people. Maybe you have sin in your life that you haven’t dealt with well; you’ve hidden it, pretended it wasn’t there, acted like it didn’t matter, or just decided to forget about it. One day the regret, guilt, and shame will catch up to you. We need to deal with our sins appropriately. We need to turn to God in repentance. If we truly turned to God with our sin and repented, our lives would be free from the regret of our past mistakes. We would be able to move past our sin, move past our relationship struggles and personality conflicts, move past our bitterness and anger and resentment, and we would live the joy filled life God intended us to live.

Next Steps

Let’s talk about how this text should work in our lives—what this text would look like if we lived this text.

1) Recognize the need to repent

A first next step for us is to recognize the need to repent.  That is clear in our text today. God desires repentance!  God rejoices in repentant sinners.  I don’t know what you are struggling with today, but we can come to him in repentance and get rid of your regret.  

2) Rejoice over repentant sinners

A Second next step for us is to rejoice over repentant sinners.  If we truly had the heart of God, we would rejoice when sinners repent.  Too often this is not the case. This has been historically difficult for conservative churches.  We like to throw the book at people so to speak. We like to only add to their guilt and shame; increase their regret. Jesus doesn’t do this; Jesus takes away the shame and regret of repentant sinners. We shouldn’t criticize or ostracize those who repent. Rather, we should come alongside of them, support them, and encourage them. That’s what true Biblical discipleship is all about.   

3) Pursue unbelievers with the message of repentance

If we recognize that repentance is greater than regret, then we should be pursuing unbelievers with the message of repentance. We should be telling them about the God who forgives, and the God who accepts. Too often our message is to focus on sin and how they shouldn’t be doing this or shouldn’t be doing that.  Let me just say, sin is only part of the message of the Gospel.  And Gospel, the word Gospel, means good news. Too many times believers share a message of judgment and sin and punishment, but forget that the message of the Gospel is good news—good news about forgiveness of sin and freedom from shame. Our text today should push us to share this message, a message of repentance, to those who need the forgiveness of our God. 

4) Forgive like Jesus forgives

Finally, this text should cause us to forgive like Jesus forgives. If we repent and receive forgiveness, we ought to also be offering the forgiveness of Jesus. 

 

Let’s be a people who move past regret, and move to repentance, because repentance is greater than regret. Regret weighs us down, but repentance gives us freedom. Let’s choose freedom!